KLB Klaagbaak
Klaag maar raak voor een knaak.
quote:Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style postion was fun, it reminded him what it would be like to rape a girl. FML
quote:Today, I went to a movie with my boyfriend. In the lobby, I asked why the glasses were not working. I said, "Do they only work inside the theater?" My boyfriend replied, "3-D glasses just work inside the movie, everything else in the World is pretty much 3-D." FML
Op zondag 8 maart 2009 21:38 schreef Danny het volgende:
fuck de policy. posten die hap!
fuck de policy. posten die hap!
quote:Today, I was complaining to my sister about how jealous I was of her looks. Her response was "Sometimes it's okay to be the ugly sister. Like, you have less of a chance of getting raped." FML
Op zondag 8 maart 2009 21:38 schreef Danny het volgende:
fuck de policy. posten die hap!
fuck de policy. posten die hap!
quote:Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad proceeded to warn me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML
[b]Op dinsdag 10 februari 2004 14:36 schreef Malawi het volgende:[/b]
Het in den oren stoppen van kiwi's is dus een probaat tijgeraanvalafweermiddel
Het in den oren stoppen van kiwi's is dus een probaat tijgeraanvalafweermiddel
quote:Today, when my boyfriend and I were lying in bed, he grabbed my double chin and goes "gobble, gobble". FML
[b]Op dinsdag 10 februari 2004 14:36 schreef Malawi het volgende:[/b]
Het in den oren stoppen van kiwi's is dus een probaat tijgeraanvalafweermiddel
Het in den oren stoppen van kiwi's is dus een probaat tijgeraanvalafweermiddel
quote:Today, my best friend invited me to dinner at his house. When I went to the toilet, I found my wife's wedding ring in a cup, which she'd lost a week ago. FML
[b]Op dinsdag 10 februari 2004 14:36 schreef Malawi het volgende:[/b]
Het in den oren stoppen van kiwi's is dus een probaat tijgeraanvalafweermiddel
Het in den oren stoppen van kiwi's is dus een probaat tijgeraanvalafweermiddel
quote:Today, my boyfriend's sister called me to wish me congratulations and ask me when I was due. I said I wasn't prenant to which she replied "Yes you are, my brother just told us the good news". Long pause. "Oh wait is this Mary or Morgan?" I'm Morgan. Who's Mary? FML
Op zondag 8 maart 2009 21:38 schreef Danny het volgende:
fuck de policy. posten die hap!
fuck de policy. posten die hap!
quote:Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML
quote:Today, I saw the following message on my Facebook News Feed: "Morning Sex: [My mom] and [My dad] are fans. Click here to Join" FML
quote:Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML
quote:Today, I was buying an expensive pillow for my mother from a store clerk who wouldn't stop staring at my boobs. After paying, I saw an elderly lady who had dropped a bag, so I walked to help. I walked back to the clerk, who refused to believe I paid. The reason? He didn't recognize my face. FML[quote]Today, I was buying an expensive pillow for my mother from a store clerk who wouldn't stop staring at my boobs. After paying, I saw an elderly lady who had dropped a bag, so I walked to help. I walked back to the clerk, who refused to believe I paid. The reason? He didn't recognize my face. FML
Deze site is wel een kickje waardquote:Today, my fiance of two years told me he was bored of me and he'd just prolonged the engagement to see if anyone more interesting would come along in the mean time. He was upset because no one did. FML
quote:Today, I was sitting in class and I fell asleep during the lesson. I was wearing sweatpants and had an erection. My teacher came up to me and grabbed my penis. She thought it was my phone. FML
Leipe shizzlequote:Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
Swiggity swooty, I'm coming for that booty.
quote:Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML
Op woensdag 23 juni 2010 22:44 schreef Chuck_Norris het volgende:
Haha Jap jonge trollgod
Op woensdag 23 juni 2010 22:48 schreef Skylark. het volgende:
Chuck is mastertrolled _O_.
Haha Jap jonge trollgod
Op woensdag 23 juni 2010 22:48 schreef Skylark. het volgende:
Chuck is mastertrolled _O_.
quote:Today, I heard my sister masturbating in her room. I took the dog around the block to get out of the house, and I came back to see her leaving her room... my electric toothbrush in her hand. FML
quote:Today, my mom : "You and your dad like all the same foods right? Try this for me", she then proceeds to give me a strawberry flavored jelly. I say that it tastes good and ask what she gave me. "It's my new nipple cream, I want to surprise your dad tonight." FML
quote:Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML
quote:Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML
quote:Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve erections because I looked like a man. FML
quote:Today I noticed that my daughter was making funny noises which oddly resembled sex sounds my wife makes. When I asked her what she was doing she said "I'm pretending to be mommy from last night." I was on a business trip last night. FML
quote:Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML
quote:Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML
quote:Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for awhile, and we weere joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML
quote:Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to Itunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML
quote:Today, I thought I heard my little sister playing on my brand new grand piano. Angry, I ran downstairs to stop her. My parents were having sex. On my piano. FML
quote:Today, I took the bus to work and a sweet old lady got on after me and sat next to me. Halfway to work, she fell asleep and her head was on my shoulder. Trying to be nice, I gently tried to wake her up before my stop came. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML
quote:Today, I decided to tell my mom about my choice to wait to have sex until after marriage. Coming from a very christian family I thought she would be proud. Instead she laughed and said, "is that your excuse for not being able to get laid?" and walked out of the room. FML
quote:Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML
quote:Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML
best heel geniaal die site , al zal90% fake zijn , tblijft humor
Op donderdag 20 augustus 2020 17:36 schreef Notorious_Roy het volgende:
Naast alle onzin die je uitkraamt heb je af en toe ook gewoon heel verstandige posts.
Op dinsdag 10 augustus 2021 16:32 schreef yvonne het volgende:
@:Jimbo voor mod, yeah *O*
Naast alle onzin die je uitkraamt heb je af en toe ook gewoon heel verstandige posts.
Op dinsdag 10 augustus 2021 16:32 schreef yvonne het volgende:
@:Jimbo voor mod, yeah *O*
quote:Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML
quote:Today, my child says "Mommy. Sometimes my peepee goes up like a stick." I say "Well, honey, that's normal and ok." Then I ask when it does that. And he says "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes..." FML
quote:Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn't hang out with me because he felt really sick. I went to his house anyway to surprise him with homemade soup. I walk in to his room only to find him hooking up with my sister. She can't drive, our mom drove her there. FML
Act like you know || Autofans.nl!
Op woensdag 19 november 2008 12:15 schreef Stormqueen het volgende:
WAT BEN JE TOCH EEN ONMEUNIGE KANKERHUFTER MET EEN GIETIJZEREN PLAAT VOOR JE HARSES :')
Op woensdag 19 november 2008 12:15 schreef Stormqueen het volgende:
WAT BEN JE TOCH EEN ONMEUNIGE KANKERHUFTER MET EEN GIETIJZEREN PLAAT VOOR JE HARSES :')
Toffe moederquote:Today, I called my girlfriend to ask her to the movies. She declined and said she was sick and was going to sleep. Wanting to see the movie, I invited my mom and we went. My mom then pointed out my "sick" girlfriend making out with a guy. My mom threw a full bag of popcorn at her. FML
“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, and not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science.”
quote:Today, my father asked me if he could borrow my electric razor because he wanted to "surprise mom later". Anxious to see him without his life-long beard, I willingly agreed. About half an hour later he exited the bathroom. Beard fully intact. FML
quote:Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "hell". FML
quote:Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML
><(({°>
Het blijft leuk 
Behulpzaam als een waterkraan.
Op woensdag 29 april 2015 16:30 schreef seto het volgende:
als je niet #teamhenk bent ben je gewoon een *weggeFopt*homo
Op woensdag 29 april 2015 16:30 schreef seto het volgende:
als je niet #teamhenk bent ben je gewoon een *weggeFopt*homo
Deze is wel heel erg epic:
quote:Today, I was talking this guy I'm dating and stated that the only reason I am with him is because of what he buys me. I was joking. He then responded that he doesn't care because the only reason he is with me is because I give good head. He was serious. FML
Act like you know || Autofans.nl!
Op woensdag 19 november 2008 12:15 schreef Stormqueen het volgende:
WAT BEN JE TOCH EEN ONMEUNIGE KANKERHUFTER MET EEN GIETIJZEREN PLAAT VOOR JE HARSES :')
Op woensdag 19 november 2008 12:15 schreef Stormqueen het volgende:
WAT BEN JE TOCH EEN ONMEUNIGE KANKERHUFTER MET EEN GIETIJZEREN PLAAT VOOR JE HARSES :')
quote:Today, I found out my mom paid my best friend $20 to be my friend when we were 10. FML
Ok stelletje hokboeren
jammer dat er niet bij staat voor hoeveel tijd vriendschap die $20 dan wasquote:
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(='.'=)
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(='.'=)
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[b]Dingen doen met dingen, da's machtig mooi
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