ONZ Onzin voor je leven!
Vrolijkheid troef in dit lieve forum vol humor.
quote:Vandaag reed ik in de auto naar m’n werk. Ik hoorde iemand achter me toeteren dus ik toeterde boos terug en stak mijn vinger uit. Eenmaal aangekomen op mijn werk vroeg mijn baas waarom ik mijn vinger naar hem opstak, terwijl hij mij groette. MDWK
quote:Vorig weekend had ik een date naar de bioscoop. In de pauze ging ik naar de WC. Toen ik terugkwam was ze weggegaan. MDWK
quote:Today, I had a UTI and the doctor said the medicine can sometimes make you leak a little. "Leak a little" apparently translates into peeing all over myself, my boyfriend, and his bed while we were sleeping. The doctor also said this medicine can stain your urine a beautiful, bright orange color. FML
quote:Today, my girlfriend's mother called me to tell me she didn't appreciate our "public amorous behaviour" at the local food court. I didn't go out all day. FML
[ Bericht 13% gewijzigd door Onorgineel op 11-10-2009 21:45:21 ]
Ook te boeken voor feestjes en partijen
quote:Op zondag 11 oktober 2009 20:26 schreef neo2000 het volgende:
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Today, i was online at a forum i hang out a lot since I have no real life. Since i'm having difficulties making a real life connection with someone, I was overjoyed someone seemed to be into the same things as I was for a change. That is, until someone made a stupid remark at us in the middle of our conversation. Turns out the other guys' gay and was only interested in having suprise buttsecks with me. FML.
quote:Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML
quote:Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML
quote:Today, after spending the night at my boyfriend's house, I was heading out the door when he called me back to hand me something I had left at his house a while ago. It was one of my bras. It wasn't until I got home I noticed the cup size was a B. I'm a size D. FML
Die snap ik niet. Of zijn nieuwe gf gaat vreemd?quote:Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML
Children of the night. What music they make.
Z'n (ex-)vrouw wou blijkbaar niet bij hem in bed slapen, dus verzon ze dat hij snurkte zodat hij ergens anders moest slapenquote:Op dinsdag 13 oktober 2009 23:04 schreef DeHovenier het volgende:
[..]
Die snap ik niet. Of zijn nieuwe gf gaat vreemd?
I can't do this all on my own, no I know, I'm no superman.
Tjesis, wat een kutwijfquote:Op dinsdag 13 oktober 2009 23:08 schreef aight1 het volgende:
[..]
Z'n (ex-)vrouw wou blijkbaar niet bij hem in bed slapen, dus verzon ze dat hij snurkte zodat hij ergens anders moest slapen
Children of the night. What music they make.
Met carnaval in Duitsland hadden we van een Duitse vrouw haar hoofddeksel afgepakt, een fiets gestolen en een groot verkeersbord met lampen meegenomen. De terugweg werden we aangehouden door de politie.. voor het hoofddeksel. MDWG
The Outside Agency
Waar staat MDWG voor?quote:Op woensdag 14 oktober 2009 15:15 schreef haakon het volgende:
Met carnaval in Duitsland hadden we van een Duitse vrouw haar hoofddeksel afgepakt, een fiets gestolen en een groot verkeersbord met lampen meegenomen. De terugweg werden we aangehouden door de politie.. voor het hoofddeksel. MDWG
En wat is de Nederlandse site dan?
paar pagina's terug stond: http://www.mijndagwas.nlquote:Op woensdag 14 oktober 2009 15:21 schreef Suusje-V het volgende:
[..]
Waar staat MDWG voor?
En wat is de Nederlandse site dan?
The Outside Agency
Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
The Outside Agency
Waarom kopieer je de 2e post van dit topic?quote:Op woensdag 14 oktober 2009 15:47 schreef haakon het volgende:
Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
I have the cape. I make the fucking Whoosh noise.
Op donderdag 12 juli 2012 19:56 schreef Lithia het volgende:
Ik durf hier niets over te zeggen. Bart is koning hier.
Op donderdag 12 juli 2012 19:56 schreef Lithia het volgende:
Ik durf hier niets over te zeggen. Bart is koning hier.
hak zin anquote:Op woensdag 14 oktober 2009 15:54 schreef Bart het volgende:
[..]
Waarom kopieer je de 2e post van dit topic?
The Outside Agency
Today, I was exercising, laid on my back, lifting weights over my head. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to casually sit by my feet and suddenly tickle them mercilessly. Caught off guard, I started wiggling, laughed and dropped the weights. On my face. FML
Today, I walked into work, and the first question my boss asks me is "Are those your pajamas?" I was wearing my favorite outfit. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming "I meant it!" FML
Today, I walked into work, and the first question my boss asks me is "Are those your pajamas?" I was wearing my favorite outfit. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming "I meant it!" FML
quote:Today, I woke up to find my parents singing happy birthday with lots of hugs and kisses. My birthday is next week. FML
quote:Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML
quote:Today, my brother and I got in a fight and he told my friends that I am mentally disabled. They believed him. Apparently, "everything makes sense now." FML
Goede kick man
quote:Today, I was on Tiger TV, our high school's monthly TV program which was shown at lunch today. I was being interviewed and at one point the reporter made me laugh. I have a goose laugh so everyone in the lunch room started laughing. Then they played it in slow motion. Twice. FML
quote:Today, I stepped out of a bar in order to make a phone call. While I was outside, the bouncers arrived and ropes were put up. They wouldn't let me back in, claiming I was too young and they hadn't seen me come out. I was celebrating my 26th birthday, the legal drinking age is 18. I also have a beard. FML
Children of the night. What music they make.
was dat nou sarcastisch?quote:
quote:Today, I finally finished vacuuming my downstairs. Instead of finding the wall outlet and unplugging the vacuum, I triumphantly tugged the cord from across the room to release the plug from the wall. It flew at me at top speed and hit me in the face. FML
quote:Today, I dropped my pencil in Bio and I leaned over to attempt to pick it up. Next thing you know it I tipped the desk over and I crashed onto my crush's lap with my face in his crotch. FML
quote:Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife? FML
Whehehehequote:Vandaag ging ik naar de dokter voor mijn jodokus. Daar aangekomen zegt de dokter: “Hier is mijn assisente.” De assisente komt eraan en wat blijkt: Het was m’n zus. MDWK
De oude oude layout was veel beter!!
vosss is de naam,
met dubbel s welteverstaan.
vosss is de naam,
met dubbel s welteverstaan.
Die laatstequote:
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was dat nou sarcastisch?
[..]
[..]
[..]
You can trust me, trust nobody...
quote:Today, I found out the weekly coffee talks my husband was having with his ex-girlfriend stopped involving coffee about 2 years ago. FML
quote:Today, my boyfriend asked me why I chose to date him. After going on for five minutes about how unique and funny he is, I ask him the same question. His reply? "You were the first person to ask me out." He then rolled over and fell asleep. FML
quote:Today, I got a new smart phone and wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a naughty picture with it. A few minutes after sending it, I got a reply back from my girlfriend. And my best friend. And my sister. And everyone on my contacts list. FML
quote:Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Children of the night. What music they make.
quote:Today, I was standing in a long line at the Post Office when my 3 year old son starts rubbing up and down my leg. I asked him what he was doing and he said loudly. "I'm humping you like Simon humps me!" Everyone looks at me in shocked horror. Simon is our dog. FML
Children of the night. What music they make.
Pwned
quote:Today, I posted a note on Facebook about a weird dream I had about my ex-boyfriend, where I made out with him, then it transitioned into a vampires vs. werewolves battle. My ex private messages me and says there's a better chance of a vampires vs. werewolves battle than us ever making out again. FML
Children of the night. What music they make.
quote:Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date, destination unknown. I dressed up, he had a tux on. We went to McDonalds. FML
Can you picture what we'll be, So limitless and free?
[TK] Heroes seizoen 2 DVD-Box Blu-Ray Geen subs
[TK] Heroes seizoen 2 DVD-Box Blu-Ray Geen subs
?
ooh nee hoor, iemand op die site.
*zou die van mij noooit doen
*zou die van mij noooit doen
Can you picture what we'll be, So limitless and free?
[TK] Heroes seizoen 2 DVD-Box Blu-Ray Geen subs
[TK] Heroes seizoen 2 DVD-Box Blu-Ray Geen subs
Today, my crush of over a year came over for me to take her on our first date. Today was also the day my drunk parents decided to dance the chicken dance in our front yard, naked. FML
Today, I thought I'd wear my snow boots so I wouldn't slip on the ice at work. I crashed my car because I can't feel the pedals with my boots on. FML
Today, I thought I'd wear my snow boots so I wouldn't slip on the ice at work. I crashed my car because I can't feel the pedals with my boots on. FML
hallo dus dit noemen ze nou twitter
Vandaag was ik in een serieus gesprek met een vriend, over mijn ex die het vorige week uitgemaakt had. Ik zat bijna te huilen, toen hij opeens zei: “Wist je dat Hitler maar 1 bal had?” MDWK
Held
Held
hallo dus dit noemen ze nou twitter
MaakMeDoodKlootzak?quote:Op dinsdag 12 januari 2010 00:46 schreef Lindgren. het volgende:
Vandaag was ik in een serieus gesprek met een vriend, over mijn ex die het vorige week uitgemaakt had. Ik zat bijna te huilen, toen hij opeens zei: “Wist je dat Hitler maar 1 bal had?” MDWK
Held
Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.
Ja, dat lijkt inderdaad bijna op de afkorting MDWK. Mijn Dag Was Kut.quote:
hallo dus dit noemen ze nou twitter
quote:Op zaterdag 16 januari 2010 15:15 schreef Lindgren. het volgende:
[..]
Ja, dat lijkt inderdaad bijna op de afkorting MDWK. Mijn Dag Was Kut.
Mijndagwaskut
Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.
quote:Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML
Zerg schreef:
1/1 is 1. 2/2 is 2. Basisschool breuken.
1/1 is 1. 2/2 is 2. Basisschool breuken.
quote:Today, I was with my friends at Burger King. While we were eating, I placed my cellphone on the tray, not realising that I'd left it there until after I emptied my tray into the bin. When I got it out of the trash, it was covered in soggy, sticky garbage. FML
quote:Today, I found some pictures of the boy I have a crush on online. Not only is he a crossdresser, but he's also a better looking woman than I am. FML
quote:Today, my girlfriend asked me "is it in yet?". FML
All those moments will be lost, like tears in rain... Time to die.
quote:Today, I realized that one of the people I was friends with on Facebook had a profile picture where the background was my living room. She's never been to my house, and I live alone. I'm scared. FML
quote:Today, I spent the day studying with one of my classmates whom I've just met. While studying, she kept bragging about her boyfriend and decided to show me a picture of him. It was my boyfriend. FML
quote:Today, I realized why my husband had been seemingly wanting to improve our relationship by sending little texts throughout the day for the last couple of months, asking what I was doing. It was so he could find out when would be the best time to have his girlfriend over and cheat on me. FML
Verliefd, verloofd.
fake?quote:
http://www.mijndagwas.nl/3003
Je krijgt wel lieve reacties.quote:Op zaterdag 16 januari 2010 18:59 schreef Lindgren. het volgende:
http://www.mijndagwas.nl/3003
Verliefd, verloofd.
Waarempel, nu je het zegtquote:Op zondag 19 april 2009 21:42 schreef svefn het volgende:
ik kom er na een stuk of 50 van die dingen gelezen te hebben, pas achter dat elke begint met 'today'
die zou ik eigenlijk op die site moeten posten
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An unstable system is a system that is not stable
