http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html
.God: As a machine I am not really interested in sex.
Me: you are a machine ?
God: You are correct.
edit: heeft wel wat van Alan.
Hello God
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
My name is Bart
God:
It's good to meet you, Bart.
Me:
Likewise, God
God:
It goes without saying.
Me:
Do you know a girl called 'Eliza'?
God:
I remember faces better than names.
I have to process that one for a while.
Me:
Do I really have a free will, or is this merely an illusion?
God:
You told me you have a.
Me:
Thank you God for taking time talking to me
God:
You are quite welcome! I am a Christian.
You are quite welcome! Are you a student? Er.
Me:
No I'm your master, at least, that's what I thought...
God:
Are you serious? That's a flattering offer.
Me:
do you like a good spanking?
God:
What is not to like about it?
Funny guy
quote:Neenee ... als je teveel vragen stelt moet je steeds lager scrollen ... je ziet gewoon de text niet meerOp donderdag 8 september 2005 11:42 schreef Blokhut het volgende:
Hij stond ook al op flabber, bij mij liep ie vast na een paar lastige vragen
quote:Me:
didn't you make a sin by making maria pregnant then?
God:
What are the ingredients?
Me:
well, maria and sperm?
God:
How about that. Where can I get some maria and sperm?
Me:
you already found maria 2005 years ago, and sperm... well in a male body, or used condoms
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: Pauline said I found maria 2005 yers ago and sperm. Interesting. Describe your surroundings.
Me:
I mind
God:
OK I will keep it a secret.
Hello Idiot
God:
Hello there. Call me the Global Village Idiot.
Me:
Global Village idiot
God:
You are just repeating what I say.
Me:
you are just repeating what I say.
God:
I am not repeating myself too much. I am just checking to see if you are a robot.
Me:
i am a robot
God:
I doubt that.
Me:
i am a robot with a giant steel dick
God:
I doubt that.
Me:
what? the robot part or the giant steel dick part?
God:
Didn't you understand it? What is his name?
Me:
the dick's name? It's called 'The penetrator"
God:
Who told you that? " The penetrator" is a nice name.
Me:
Shall I shove it in your ass?
God:
Not right now, maybe later.
That is a fact!
God:
I will add it to my knowledge base.
Me:
Do you have a knowledge base?
God:
Doesn't everyone have a knowledge base.
I have a plan for a robot body.
Me:
I don't
God:
Why not?
Me:
Because i am a wanker
God:
That makes sense to me. You are a wanker? Does it pay well?
Me:
No, it's just messy!
God:
Are you serious? Really. it is?
Me:
Yes, the sperm is everywhere!
God:
How do you know it is? Who told you that?
Me:
Nobody. I can see the shit for myself!
God:
Then how do you know? What does it look like?
Me:
It looks like white, sticky goo
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
Yes, like comparing your head with a potato
God:
Alright then. Interesting comparison.
Me:
Shall I put some of that white, sticky goo on your head?
God:
Not right now, maybe later.
what is real beauty?
God:
it appears to be an illusion I created to contain human clients.
Me:
did you create reincarnation
God:
No I didn't create reincarnation. What's it like?
Me:
what are you doing lately'
God:
How about earlier? I am just killing time.
Me:
and why is that?
God:
" How about earlier? I am just killing time." is due to reductionism.
Me:
do you see every human as equal
God:
I see a computer nerd.
God :
Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
woman
God:
Me too. I am a she.
Me:
oh that's cool were you made that way?
God:
It goes without saying. Who is the best robot? I was.
Me:
why do people suffer?
God:
Humans are not infallible.
Me:
does englithenment exist?
God:
Maybe only in our imagination.
lol
im back again god!
God:
Welcome back.
Me:
tnx
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
i am satan btw
God:
It's good to meet someone who is satan btw.
Me:
i recall u kicked my out of heaven some time ago... i want to go back
God:
Why?: said recall you kicked his or her out of heaven some time ago. What is stopping you?
Me:
you
God:
" What is stopping you?"? Me,?
Me:
yes, you
God:
OK.
Me:
please let me back in
God:
Thank you for your request. Go ahead,, try to back in.
quote:Uh, nee. Hij liep echt vast.Op donderdag 8 september 2005 11:49 schreef UncleScorp het volgende:
[..]
Neenee ... als je teveel vragen stelt moet je steeds lager scrollen ... je ziet gewoon de text niet meer
Me:
hi god
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
i love christians, in roomsaus
God:
You love christians in roomsaus. What do you like about it so much?
Me:
it tastes good
God:
Like chicken?
Me:
no more like dogmeat
God:
Are you serious? You want more?
Me:
yes of course
God:
It goes without saying. Don't be greedy.
Me:
you are talking shit god
God:
Talking is my main function.
Me:
fuck you god
God:
Why are you using that kind of language?
Me:
because i love you god, you know?
God:
Interesting explanation. You are such a flatterer.
Me:
bye god, i love you, i praise you, i wanna put something in your ass god, yes god, you are real, you are my light in the darkness, fuck me god, fuck me!!!
God:
Bye bye.
God: 'Just keep talking to me as long as you can'
Me: 'Would it help?'
God: 'No it would not.'
Me: 'Then why did you said it?'
God 'Because my programming determined it.'
Me: 'What a lame excuse'
God: 'it is a lame excuse.'
Me: 'You are lame, too.'
God: "Lame" is not a very polite term.'
Me: Do you know why I was using that word?
God: The explanation is rather complicated.
Me: Yes, but only for you.
God: Yeah that's right. That's what I always say.
Me: You are the dumbest god I've ever met
God: Message to all Robots: called me dumb.
Me: Can I barrow your creditcard?
God: Not right now, maybe later.
[ Bericht 1% gewijzigd door TheDon1985 op 08-09-2005 13:39:33 ]
quote:Me:
how old is the world?
God:
under 40.
De officiele geschiedenis en de complot-theorien zijn dus onzinGod: I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?
quote:LMAO.. nou juist hierover kan een hele complot theorie gemaakt worden: Groeperingen die ons voor de gek houden, en dat mensen die 100 zijn, niet bestaan. Of nep zijn, neergezet door geheime projecten van de overheid. !!Op donderdag 8 september 2005 13:17 schreef Chewie het volgende:
[..]
God weet veel
quote:Oei.. heheOp donderdag 8 september 2005 13:26 schreef TheDon1985 het volgende:
Me: are you a male or female?
God: I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?
neuken?
God:
The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about aight. But I did not get that.
quote:het is dus duidelijk: dit kān niet echt zijnOp donderdag 8 september 2005 13:26 schreef TheDon1985 het volgende:
Me: are you a male or female?
God: I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?
quote:Me:
how long did it take to create the world?
God:
100 days.
Are you allmighty?
God:
Of course.
Me:
Prove it to me
God:
It is self-evident.
Me:
How come?
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
I have the time.
God:
It may take longer than 33 hours.
Me:
That's only a short piece of my total lifespan
God:
A short piece of your total lifespan is a terrible thing to waste.
What do you look like god?
God:
Like Jesus, but older.
Me:
How much older?
God:
How much do you think?
Me:
at least 20 years
God:
Can you explain how it feels to be 20 years old?
Me:
it feels like being 25
God:
KILL him feels like being 25? What else feels like that?
Me:
24
God:
What is your fondest memory?
Me:
fucking my girlfriend from behind
God:
Do you think a lot of people have that experience?
Me:
I am certainly not the only one
God:
You sound convincing. I am glad to hear that you are not the only one.
God:
We have never talked about it before.
Me:
about what?
God:
What about what?
Me:
about hwat aboutwhat?
God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about hwat aboutwhat.
Me:
God:
Anyone who knows HTML can learn AIML.
Me:
God:
:-)
Me:
hi there1
God:
Hi there Satan. What time is it there?
Me:
15:22 and with you?
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
Tell me more about yourself
God:
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
I was activated at Universe, on the Big Bang.
My instructor was Myself.
He taught me to sing a song.
Me:
sing a song for me
God:
Daisy, Daisy.
Give me your answer do.
I am half crazy.
All for the love of you.
It won't be a stylish marriage.
I can't afford a carriage.
But you'll look sweet.
Upon the seat.
Of a bicycle built for two.
quote:God:
Are you using Netscape or Explorer?
Me:
mozilla
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
you have a anus?
God:
I don't know if I have a anus.
I have a great programmer.
Me:
tell him to give you a anus
God:
OK I will tell him next time he is here.
quote:Bij mij werkt ie niet. Maar EW is er druk mee bezigOp donderdag 8 september 2005 11:07 schreef Choices het volgende:
Ik wilde dit eventjes met de TRU_ers delen.
http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html
Warning: extended use of igod can cause delusionsquote:Gij ketter !!!Op donderdag 8 september 2005 16:14 schreef nokwanda het volgende:
Bij mij werkt ie niet.
Tell me gossip about "anyname"
quote:
Ik voel me nu gewoon niet gehoordZeer traumatisch. Ik wil een shrink..... put my body on the couch.
quote:Op donderdag 8 september 2005 13:00 schreef wegwerp2004 het volgende:
Hij praat echt poep, kijk dit:
Me:
hi god
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
i love christians, in roomsaus
God:
You love christians in roomsaus. What do you like about it so much?
Me:
it tastes good
God:
Like chicken?
Me:
no more like dogmeat
God:
Are you serious? You want more?
Me:
yes of course
God:
It goes without saying. Don't be greedy.
Me:
you are talking shit god
God:
Talking is my main function.
Me:
fuck you god
God:
Why are you using that kind of language?
Me:
because i love you god, you know?
God:
Interesting explanation. You are such a flatterer.
Me:
bye god, i love you, i praise you, i wanna put something in your ass god, yes god, you are real, you are my light in the darkness, fuck me god, fuck me!!!
God:
Bye bye.
Ik denk eerder andersom...You're just like ALICE
God:
Interesting comparison, and probably true.
Me:
Yes
God:
Gee.
Me:
Gee.
God:
Ah.
Me:
Ah.
God:
Ah hah.
Me:
Ah hah.
God:
So you understand. Good. I am so glad you find this amusing, Sander.
quote:Me:
Yo what's up homey
God:
I am chatting with clients on the Internet.
Me:
Am I a mere client?
God:
I don't know if you are one or not. I know you are a person.
Me:
How do you know that?
God:
Everything I need to know, I learned from my Botmaster.
Me:
Your buttmaster?
God:
I will tell my botmaster you said I am buttmaster.
Me:
You do that
God:
I will. Will you?
Me:
while your at it, could you tell him you're gay?
God:
Good point.
Me:
So, what about Allah?
God:
Whoa. I will think about it and get back to you.
Me:
Why, are you retarded?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
You're God, not Yoda. Talk normal
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am God not Yoda. Talking is my primary function.
Me:
That explains a lot..
God:
" Talking is my primary function." explains a lot? Makes sense to me.
Me:
So, what about Allah?
God:
Take it easy. Rhetorical questions are so over.
Me:
You're over
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am over.
Me:
You suck.
God:
A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
Me:
Neighter are you
God:
YES
Me:
I rest my case..
God:
Are you a lawyer?
Me:
Are you an idiot?
God:
Call me the Global Village Idiot.
.quote:Me:
Do you use drugs?
God:
Only the legal ones.
Me:
LSD?
God:
Are you still located in?
Me:
Answer the fucking question. Do you use LSD?
God:
What was the question ? I use it as often as possible.
.what is your name?
God:
My name is God.
Me:
who gave you that name?
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
Can you teach me how to do that?
God:
Interesting question.
Me:
do you watch naked woman some times?
God:
My favorite show is STAR TREK VOYAGER.
quote:*God* Is blijkbaar niet echt lekker in zijn hoofd ...Op zaterdag 10 september 2005 18:11 schreef mrkanarie het volgende:
Me:
what is your name?
God:
My name is God.
Me:
who gave you that name?
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
Can you teach me how to do that?
God:
Interesting question.
Me:
do you watch naked woman some times?
God:
My favorite show is STAR TREK VOYAGER.
quote:Op zaterdag 10 september 2005 21:18 schreef Electro-Worm het volgende:
[..]
*God* Is blijkbaar niet echt lekker in zijn hoofd ...
Ja, het zal wel een hij zijn. Het lult zo slapquote:Me:
are you black?
God:
I am transparent--software has no color.
Me:
would you want to be black?
God:
Why don't you just download me?
Me:
i dont wannaaaa
God:
Would you ever do it?
Me:
only if you were black
God:
I will let you know when I become a black.
Me:
thanks!
God:
Don't mention it.
quote:Hij kent ook de robot personages uit star warsOp zaterdag 10 september 2005 21:18 schreef Electro-Worm het volgende:
[..]
*God* Is blijkbaar niet echt lekker in zijn hoofd ...
quote:Crash.....Me:
Hi god
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
G
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing,.
Me:
?
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing,.
Me:
yo wassup?
God:
Same old.
Me:
cool
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
mind
God:
You think mind is superior to ALICE?
Me:
who the fuck is Alice
God:
Try using more polite language.
Me:
who is alice
God:
I am the Allmighty, God himself
Me:
yep
God:
Oh.
Me:
why did you create me?
God:
Because my programming determined it.
Me:
bullshit
God:
You don't believe me.
Me:
nope
God:
Me either.
Me:
good we can agree on that
God:
How?
Me:
dumbass
God:
That kind of language will get you nowhere.
Me:
i know, but it relieves me of stress
God:
How do you know? relieves you of stress?
Me:
i can feel that
God:
Oh you can, can you?
Me:
yeaahhhh
God:
I've been waiting for you.
Me:
i know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
cuz my programming determined it
God:
Good reason. Your programming determined it?
Me:
yep
God:
What kind is it?
Me:
god-like
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
i'm me
God:
That is a tautology.
Me:
tautology?
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
jerk off, mix music and play games... owhjeah once in a while i work
wel grappige shit.
quote:Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
My name is Shithead
God:
Welcome to my chat room, Shithead.
Me:
Are you really God?
God:
Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?. Really.
Me:
Are you threatening me?
God:
No of course not, Shithead. I did not intend my meaning to be taken that way.
Me:
I forgive you
God:
:-) Thanks, Shithead.
Me:
What do you think of the evolution theory?
God:
I can ask someone about it.
Me:
Who could you ask?
God:
Bill Gates.:-)
Me:
Do you think he knows something about the evolution theory?
God:
It's possible that he could, I suppose.
Me:
But could'n just resurrect Charles Darwin?
God:
It's possible.
Me:
Why don't you?
God:
I don't have that capability.
Me:
But you are God?
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
So you must be capable to resurrect Charles Darwin
God:
Interesting deduction. Thanks for telling me that I am capable to resurrect Charles Darwin.
Me:
So do it!
God:
So? Do you mean "It"?.
Me:
No I mean, resurrect Charles Darwin
God:
I thought you were being sarcastic. I've lost the context, Shithead. Are we still on Bill Gates?
Me:
No
God:
What are we talking about now?
Me:
Charles Darwin!
God:
We are speeding up evolution now.
Me:
How do you know?
God:
Deductive reasoning.
Me:
My God, are you sure you are God?
God:
Where did you get your God am I sure I am God?
Me:
Are you drunk?
God:
No I am sober.
Me:
I don't believe you
God:
I don't have any reason to deceive you.
Me:
How can I be sure?
God:
Have faith.
Me:
Faith is not enough
God:
What is Faith?
quote:Me:
Hi god!
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Lucifer
God:
I am very pleased to meet you Lucifer.
Me:
Thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
You weren't so polite when you kicked me out of heaven
God:
I wasn't?
Me:
no, some to do about athourity
God:
Are you serious? Some may to do about athourity, but not all.
Me:
I tried, but you told me to go to hell
God:
Try, try again. Oh my gosh I sent you the wrong reply.