Funny links, pics & clips - #80 Met extra weinig originele grappen

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 12:44 schreef Holy_Goat het volgende:
Tvp

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 12:44 schreef Holy_Goat het volgende:
Tvp

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 14:06 schreef Crocodi1e het volgende:
[ afbeelding ]
This threadz is now about Uncle Dolanz

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 14:06 schreef Crocodi1e het volgende:
[ afbeelding ]
This threadz is now about Uncle Dolanz

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 14:06 schreef Crocodi1e het volgende:
[ afbeelding ]
This threadz is now about Uncle Dolanz

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 14:20 schreef Crocodi1e het volgende:
Unclo Dolan

[ afbeelding ]
Hij houdt dit topic in de gaten

SPOILER

Om spoilers te kunnen lezen moet je zijn ingelogd. Je moet je daarvoor eerst gratis Registreren. Ook kun je spoilers niet lezen als je een ban hebt.

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 14:34 schreef Gehenna het volgende:
[ http://img265.imageshack.us/img265/6076/1281889383365.jpg (copy/paste deze link) ]

SPOILER

Om spoilers te kunnen lezen moet je zijn ingelogd. Je moet je daarvoor eerst gratis Registreren. Ook kun je spoilers niet lezen als je een ban hebt.

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 15:02 schreef Spouwerranger het volgende:
http://fuckyeahuncledolan.tumblr.com/

Geniale humor

quote:

Op zaterdag 24 december 2011 15:46 schreef PiRANiA het volgende:
[ afbeelding ]

quote:

I recently started a new job about 3 months ago. I drink coffee every morning on my commute over and this usually causes me to have to take a shit by the time i stroll into work. It has since become a ritual for me every morning. It's as if my body just knows now and triggers the shit precisely when i walk into the building. But about a month in, my ritual got fucked up....something I had not planned for happened, and this set me off on the most concentrated and diabolical destruction of another human being. You see, this is no ordinary bathroom, this is the handicapped bathroom. The nice bathroom with lots of space and sound proof walls strong enough to muffle even the loudest of ass flaps. It's heaven, and taking a shit in that bathroom every morning is the only thing that makes my day slightly good. The first day i noticed something was wrong was when i went to take that fresh morning shit, as i went to open the door I realized it was occupied...someone knows about my bathroom, and they are trying to stop me.

At first it didnt really bother me. I thought to myself okay ill chalk this up to bad timing on my part. Perhaps coming in a little late. But I soon realized this wasnt the case. No, I was getting to that bathroom the same time everyday, this was the work of an evil fuck....and he had to be stopped. I cannot express to you the feeling of walking to the bathroom ready to just completely unload in it and feeling that handle not move. A piece of my soul dies every time. So I start coming in early to work to stake out this fucker that's ruining my days. And wouldnt you know it was some fat fuck who works down the hall. So for weeks i would trail him...get to know his every movement, frankly, I stalked this man and watched HIS morning ritual. I decided at that time it would be only fair to destroy his as he destroyed mine. I started out with very childish things like taking all the toilet paper out of the bathroom before he got in there. But what if he didnt shit that day? it would be no problem for him at all. That just didnt sit well with me. I had to step up my game. I was desperate. While i was stalking my prey i noticed he likes to grab a cup of coffee from the kitchen and then go back to his desk to start work. I knew this would be my chance to strike.

For the next week or so i trailed him and even interacted with him a few times. We laughed and joked and even began to get friendly. But i wanted this to happen. It was a friday and i came in extra early that day, because i was about to set my plan into motion. I walked up and down the hall to his office to make sure he wasnt in yet, and he wasnt. So i went over to the coffee maker and slipped in an ungodly amount of laxatives and eye drops....this would surely teach him a lesson. And then I waited....I waited like a lion in the grass stalking a gazelle. I was a predator and it felt great. Then it happened, i heard the thud of his fat feet walking down the hall he was coming and i would be waiting. I set myself up in the kitchen area with a non tainted cup of coffee just as i had been doing for weeks. He came in and we chatted as we had been doing, he told me about his boring bullshit that I didnt care about but i sat there and took it, I took it with a smile on my face because i knew i would have the last laugh. After a cup of coffee he poured a second and we parted ways. Back to his desk he went unknowingly sipping on a tainted cup of coffee that would soon send him to his end. And so i waited patiently for the drugs to kick in. Like the sounds of war drums banging in the distance I heard that familiar *thud* of his weight. He was on the move....I rushed to the hallway and with the keys from the maid i grabbed the day before locked the non-handicapped bathrooms. He was mine and i knew it. I timed it perfectly so he saw me just walk into the bathroom as he tried to go in. And then i just sat there waiting.

I sat there in the stall just smiling. Smiling to myself at what was about to happen next. And what did happen was even more amazing then i had hoped. I could tell he was starting to get nervous. He politely knocked on the door and asked if i would be done soon. To which i replied "Just a minute!" I could hear him shuffling outside and grunting, making the most uncomfortable noises ive ever heard. I knew the drugs were kicking in and he wouldnt be able to walk down 3 flights of stairs to the nearest bathroom. I sat there smiling at myself in the mirror. His actions became more hostile by the minute, he started to bang on door and yell at me "Get out of the bathroom!!!" and "What are you doing in there?!!??" I replied "Just a minute!" I could tell he was getting angry, he started to curse at me now. Calling me all sorts of bad names, i laughed at his feeble and childish attempt to get me out of the bathroom. And then it happened. All those weeks of waiting, stalking and the pain i felt from the disruption to my morning shit. It all was completely mended in a completely cathartic experience. He began to shit himself. The amount of drugs i put in just couldn't be contained in his weak colon and it broke through is asshole like an unstoppable rebel force. He screamed and even started crying in pain. I could smell the shit, from in the bathroom and hear the watery dump splash onto the floor. I danced in there. I dont know why but i actually danced it was like the sweet sounds of mozart to me all the work i had put in reduced down to the delightful sounds of a full grown man shitting his pants outside the door. After the screaming stopped i opened the door and there he was sitting against the wall sweating, beet red with people from the office standing and looking on in horror as a fat man lie there with shit all over himself. I looked at him and our eyes met.