Auw

Tuesday, 3 May 2011
"Lay down now, I’ll ease your heart, erase your frown"
Netherlands
3Js- Never Alone"We all know the glitter and glamour of the Dutch town of Volendam", begins the Dutch press release, seemingly without irony. "But, of course, it also has another side to it. For sometimes relationships break up and dreams end in disillusions". What?
"It is that side of life that the 3JS sing about. Dreamers and fools, that's what they are". Dreamers you say? "Dreamers of a better world, fools pursuing their ideals. And whether it's about love or being recognised for their music, they give it their all. For, in their own words, they believe in life". Oh for crying out loud. At this rate you can fucking bring back De Toppers for all I care.
On Line, on digital and on 88 to 91 FM, here we are then in the Netherlands, the only country whose selection process last year consisted of allowing the general public to choose between five different versions of the same song (written by the gradfather of the smurfs) sung by the same artist. And still it didn't get out of the semis.
That was in and of itself a step up from 2009, when Holland entered Howard Stableford off of Tomorrow's world, Bill Rammell MP and television's MacGyver in silver space suits, dancing like someone's embarrassing dad at a wedding to literally the worst piece of music ever entered into any song competition ever. Google it if you don't believe me.
This, then, is their stab at doing it "properly", where "properly" means painfully bland, middle of the road Radio 2 film soundtrack fodder that is so dull and inoffensive that it is likely to do even worse than the shiny granfathers of 2009.
If you can be bothered to get this far, he appears to sing "There are golden gardens at the sweet end of your trail" at the end. I'd get that checked out if I were you.
Bron