Dus klaar nu? Betekent dat dat 'ie zo verstuurd is?
quote:
Op maandag 30 juli 2007 11:29 schreef Sugar het volgende:Dear madam or sir,
This letter is regarding Pietje Puk's character referance and duties to our company.
PP has been working for our company from 1998 untill november 2007. During these years P had shown talent and skills beyond what we had expected from him. He had a city or a suburb target and made sure the selling and ability deliver were succesful, he had moved on to organising 25 people to do national campaigns. Through this duties his attitude and positive enthusiasm brought him to the highest level and degree in my company. PP had moved on to start companies for me in Antwerpen (Belgium). He coordinated the start on his own and found the correct people to make a great corporation...
Waarom alles in voltooid verleden tijd? Dingen als "During these years P
had shown talent and skills beyond what we
had expected from him" kun je toch beter formuleren als "During these years P has shown his talents and skills are beyond expectations." Je formulering klonk wel erg voorzichtig, alsof het goed mogelijk is dat die "talent and skills" inmiddels behoorlijk weggezakt zijn.
Referance --> reference
untill --> until
"He had a city or a suburb target and made sure the selling and ability deliver were succesful, he had moved on to organising 25 people to do national campaigns." --> ???
correct people --> right people
"After finishing that" --> finishing what???
"He's built up" --> He has built up (sowieso, to build up a company? vreemde woordkeuze als je het mij vraagt)
"dedicated to be send to a potential client" --> sent
intergity --> integrity
"There were times that P flew from Australia to The Netherlands due to special jobs that only P himself could do." --> "There were times
when P was flown from Australia to The Netherlands
for special assignments only he was suited to complete."ultramediacommunication" --> ik heb communicatie gestudeerd, maar dit ken ik dus niet?
"We would always be glad to have P back, but he wants to challenge himself further." --> "We were always glad to have P back, but he wishes to advance and take on a new challenge."
"We miss him" --> group hug, anyone?
"If you have any questions or other things that you would like to know more about, please don’t hesitate to contact me." --> other things, maar dat zijn dus geen vragen? wat zou other things dan kunnen zijn... een boel commentaar op de brief?
Het "please" zit ook wel erg misplaatst in die zin.
Maar goed. Ik hoop dus van harte dat "dus klaar nu" niet betekent dat 'ie zo verstuurd is, want die waslijst die ik er nu zo even uit vis is nog niet eens compleet...