haha fuck ik heb um nu wel verklapt mer gullie wist da zelf
ook vas wel te verzinne... duh........
quote:Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:08 schreef Adieu het volgende:
wtf ben je lomp??? ik geef het antwoord tog mannnn
Ze lagen al op naam, dus hij heeft ze niet gesorteerd quote:Pikstein! Chuck Norris bepaald of ze gesorteerd liggen nee dan wel de ja.Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:12 schreef Herkauwer het volgende:
[..]
chuck norris ziet unne stapel ongesorteerte palletten te ligge dus
hij staart er een paar secondekes naar en PLOP! ze ligge gesorteert
op naam........
is da nou zo lastig??>
quote:Ik weet niet hoe lastig het is, ik sorteer namelijk geen palletsOp donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:14 schreef Adieu het volgende:
godver herkauwer agterlijke dwaas haha mongool
chuck norris ziet unne stapel ongesorteerte palletten te ligge dus
hij staart er een paar secondekes naar en PLOP! ze ligge gesorteert
op naam........
is da nou zo lastig??>
Dat doet Chuck Norris, dat zei je net zelf Hij kijkt naar z'n taart, schreeuwt "BAKE!" en de taart is gebakken.
5 of 10 minuutjes bove te sloape!
quote:intellectueel werk voor intellectuelen topsporters...Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:24 schreef Charizma het volgende:
why the fuck sorteert chuckie pallets ??
quote:omdat hij dat kan....Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:24 schreef Charizma het volgende:
why the fuck sorteert chuckie pallets ??
waar is die topic trouwes he met dieje vent die palletten doet
sortere??
quote:Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:32 schreef Bog het volgende:
steven ownt chuck
quote:Ja goed van me he, hij is wel veranderd de laatste tijd...Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:30 schreef Adieu het volgende:
hahaha mooi gek jij hebt die gast als unne avatar! haha lolzzz
quote:Wat hij zegt.Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:50 schreef Aparteling het volgende:
Wil iemand die Adieu bannen, hij werkt op mn zenuwen...
quote:Mij ook!Wil iemand die Adieu bannen, hij werkt op mn zenuwen...
quote:Is 'torie' geen "zwart-slang" voor 'mokkel' ?? Zo ja, wigger...Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:58 schreef 2609 het volgende:
ik snap hem echt niet deze torie
quote:Daar ken ie dan mooi geld mee verdienen...Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 14:31 schreef De_Handelaar het volgende:
chuck norris poept europallets, heb ik gehoord.
quote:kutnewbie.... is dat lachen?Op donderdag 2 februari 2006 15:04 schreef Adieu het volgende:
waar blijve jullie grapkes??? kom mer op hoor!
quote:of voor verhaal
quote:En dan zeg jij: "Ik ken hem niet hoor deze verhaal".
Ergo --> Wigger, leer nederlands!
1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
2. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
3. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
4. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
5. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
6. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
7. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies
the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
8. Chuck Norris' blood type is AK+. Ass-Kicking Positive. It is compatible only with heavy construction equipment, tanks, and fighter jets.
9. Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian.
10. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
11. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
hedde ze nie in het nederlands?? engels ben ik nie goed in man
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
In the X-Men movies, none of the X-Men super-powers are done with special effects. Chuck Norris is the stuntman for every character.
Chuck Norris was the orginal sculptor of Mount Rushmore. He completed the entire project using only a bottle opener and a drywall trowel.
Chuck Norris runs on batteries. Specifically, Die Hards
Chuck Norris likes his ice like he likes his skulls: crushed.
Chuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
wehehe
1. Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
2. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
4. MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.
5. Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
6. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
7. If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
9. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.
10. Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
11. Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
12. Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.
13. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
14. Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.
15. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
16. Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
17. Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.
18. To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.
19. There are no disabled people, only people who have met Chuck Norris.
20. Chuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway.
21. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
23. The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck Norris--more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise," and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.
24. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
25. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
26. When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.
27. It was once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates to him. Pirates never were very smart.
28. Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
29. If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris.
30. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
31. On the 7th day, God rested.... Chuck Norris took over.
32. Scientists used to believe that diamond was the world's hardest substance. But then they met Chuck Norris, who gave them a roundhouse kick to the face so hard and with so much heat and pressure that the scientists turned into artificial Chuck Norris.
33. When Chuck Norris was denied a Bacon McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a KFC.
34. Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.
35. Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick is so powerful; it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.
36. Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany.
37. If you want a list of Chuck Norris' enemies, just check the extinct species list.
38. Chuck Norris has never blinked in his entire life. Never!
39. When Chuck Norris' wife burned the turkey one thanksgiving, Chuck said, "don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."
40. Chuck Norris once shot an enemy plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
41. Chuck Norris doesn't need to swallow when eating food.
42. If Superman and The Flash were to race to the edge of space you know who would win? Chuck Norris.
43. Chuck Norris eats transformer toys in vehicle mode and poos them out transformed into a robot.
44. Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly 'get out of jail free' card.
45. Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse kicks. So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your ass, don't be offended or hurt, he may be just trying to tell you he likes your hat.
46. Chuck Norris invented water.
47. Chuck Norris went looking for a bar but couldn't find one. He walked to a vacant lot and sat there. Sure enough within an hour an a half someone constructed a bar around him. He then ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Chuck Norris yelled over the roar of the flames, "always leave things the way you found em!"
48. One time while sparring with Wolverine, Chuck Norris accidentally lost his left testicle. You might be familiar with it to this very day by its technical term: Jupiter.
49. Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
50. Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.
51. Before science was invented it was once believed that autumn occurred when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked every tree in existence.
52. In the original pilot for Star Trek Next Generation, Chuck Norris can be seen powering the USS Enterprise warp drive with his roundhouse kicks.
54. Once, a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.
55. Chuck Norris isn�t lactose intolerant. He just doesn�t put up with lactose�s shit.
56. Chuck Norris doesn�t eat. Rather he kicks ass until he�s full.
57. Scientists in Washington have recently conceded that, if there were a nuclear war, all that would remain are cockroaches and Chuck Norris.
58. After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. His reasoning? It was more �humane�.
59. Chuck Norris waited patiently in Al Capone�s vault for 63 years just so he could give Geraldo Rivera the surprise beating of his lifetime.
60. According to Einstein�s theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
61. When Chuck Norris jumps into a lake, he doesn�t get wet�..the water gets Chuck.
63. Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin, which he built himself.
64. Want to know how Chuck Norris gives a girl an orgasm? He points at them and says �boo-ya�
65. Chuck Norris never �gets laid�, rather: �laid gets Chuck�.
67. God once asked Chuck Norris what the secret of life was. Chuck proceeded to teach God Karate
69. Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he�s sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse.
70. There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
71. If Chuck Norris is going to be late, then time better slow the fuck down
72. Chuck Norris has already killed Bin Laden, the government is simply on �The Hunt� to find the pieces left over from the roundhouse kick.
73. Chuck Norris manufactures diamonds in his home by swallowing lumps of coal.
75. Chuck Norris is the real 7 wonders of the world
76. Chuck Norris cannot be created nor destroyed
77. If you dress up as Chuck Norris for Halloween no one will understand your costume and Chuck Norris will find you
79. Chuck Norris has no offspring, not because Chuck Norris doesn�t like kids, but because no woman can handle his sperm.
80. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity�twice
81. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
82. Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas
83. The square root of negative one is Chuck Norris
85. Chuck Norris is kryptonite�s weakness.
86. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
87. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
88. When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
89. Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.
90. When Chuck Norris was a teenager; he once impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the Himalaya Mountains. 9 months later, the nuns all gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in NFL history.
91. Chuck once got shot in the head. He then proceeded to surgically remove the bullet with his beard as forceps and then ate it because his daily iron count was low.
92. Ice isn�t cold water, its water that is scared still by Chuck Norris.
94. If you look at Chuck Norris while he is smiling, your entire family will get AIDS.
95. Chuck Norris can actually breathe fire.
96. A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is �Charles�. Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.
97. In the back of the Guinness Book of World Records it states �All records are currently held by Chuck Norris, and the records listed in this book are only the records of those people who have come closest to Chuck Norris�s records.�
98. Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
99. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
100. When Chuck Norris runs with scissors, other people get hurt.
101. Adam and Eve never existed. What really happened was that Chuck Norris sneezed and a human fetus emerged from his nose, this was the beginning of man.
103. The friction in Chuck Norris�s jeans after he does a roundhouse kick is the actual cause of global warming
105. Chuck Norris was once the victim of a violent robbery, when the robber realized what he had done, he immediately killed himself
106. A lock of Chuck Norris�s beard is currently sold on eBay for 12 million dollars
107. After the cancellation of Walker Texas Ranger, the crime rate in Texas went up 200 percent
108. Chuck Norris invented Canadians one day when he ran out of people to roundhouse kick
109. Chuck Norris once killed an African elephant with his mind
110. Chuck Norris�s urine is more valuable the gold in many third world countries.
112. Chuck Norris can generate enough power with one roundhouse kick to solve all of the world�s energy problems.
113. Chuck Norris never gets sick because his white blood cells know karate.
115. When Microsoft was sued for a monopoly, Chuck Norris Proceeded to roundhouse kick Hasbro Games because they invented it.
116. When Chuck Norris jumps in a pool he does get wet the water gets Chuck Norrised
118. Chuck Norris goes to bed with a night light, not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but because the dark�s afraid of Chuck Norris.
119. Chuck Norris once at a 72 oz. steak in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress
120. Chuck Norris challenged Lance Armstrong to a �who has more testicles� contest, Chuck Norris won by 5.
121. Chuck Norris once played Russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver and won.
122. One day, a police officer pulled over Chuck Norris for speeding. As Chuck Norris gave the cop his license, the image of Chuck Norris� stare in the photo immediately compelled the officer to pull out his gun and commit suicide. Chuck Norris is now wanted for 27 traffic violations and 27 traffic violation related murders.
123. Chuck Norris was born with pubic hair.
124. Chuck Norris once decided to light a fart on fire; we know this because it now exists as the sun
125. Chuck Norris isn�t a child of god�.. God is child of Chuck Norris�
126. Chuck Norris doesn�t die-Chuck Norris chooses not to live
127. Chuck Norris doesn�t make magic-Chuck Norris makes miracles
128. Chuck Norris don�t believe in God-Chuck Norris is God
129. Chuck Norris is the only survivor of the dinosaurs.
130. Kevlar armor is actually Chuck Norris�s skin. (He sheds every day).
134. Chuck Norris and his son were watching Bambi. When Bambi died his son started crying. Chuck stood up and said �I didn�t raise a pussy� and roundhouse kicked him in the face.
135. While Chuck Norris was diving off the coast of Australia, Chuck Norris round house kicked a shark. The impact was so strong it created the 2005 tsunami.
136. If chuck Norris is late �.. You better slow the fuck down
137. Chuck Norris� wife once asked if she coul leave the kitchen� his look of disgust was so incredibly powerful that it caused the earth to implode.
138. Bigfoot was once spotted by Chuck Norris;
however after staring at Bigfoot for a while Chuck proceeded to pull his pants down thinking it was a competition� Bigfoot ran into to the woods crying never to be seen again.
140. Chuck Norris traveled back in time and freed the slaves because he knew he�d need a black partner on his show one day. And by need, I mean do all the bitchwork, because Chuck Norris doesn�t need anybody.
141. If you don�t capitalize Chuck Norris�s name, he�ll kill your grandparents.
142. Chuck Norris single-handedly started and ended both world wars.
143. Chuck Norris killed Hitler, not out of patriotism, but because he had such a sorry excuse for facial hair.
144. Chuck Norris shot 50 Cent 9 times but let him live for their upcoming feature film.
149. Chuck Norris is the only record in medical history to beat cancer, not by chemotherapy, but a brief series of spinning roundhouse kicks.
150. Great White Sharks have an agreement with Chuck Norris, that if he sticks to the land, they�ll stick to the water.
152. Chuck Norris goes door to door across the country making sure people are getting their daily quota of Walker, Texas Ranger.
153. Reportedly, Chuck Norris vomits blood upon seeing any Ben Affleck movie, stating that Affleck �couldn�t roundhouse kick his way out of a wet paper bag.�
154. Chuck Norris is responsible for the earth�s wobble in orbit.
Because each roundhouse delivered to a persons face puts the earth out of whack every time.
155. Karate is Chuck Norris spelled backwards
156. �To be or not to be? That is the question�. . . unless you are talking about being in the presence of Chuck Norris which in that case you�d choose �not to be� unless you want a roundhouse kick to the face!
158. You can kill two birds with one stone, or if you�re Chuck Norris, you can murder 12 people with one roundhouse kick to the face.
160. A blind man accidentally step on Chuck Norris� shoe and Chuck Norris said,�do you know who I am?� The blind man said no and Chuck said,�I am Chuck Norris� and the man�s blindness was cured by the mere mention of his name
161. When Chuck Norris pee�s it rains. (HARD)
163. Jesus wears a wwcnd bracelet (what would Chuck Norris do). Unfortunately he did not do what Chuck Norris would do, or else he would have roundhouse kicked the people who nailed him to the cross.
164. Chuck Norris beat Jesus in a miracle contest.
165. Hitler committed suicide because Chuck Norris was on his way.
166. Chuck Norris sperm is full grown babies. And when the women gives birth the babies are full grown Chucks.
167. Crop circles are Chuck Norris�s way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down
168. Chuck Norris does not go hunting. Hunting implies failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
169. Everybody has a skeleton or two in their closet. Chuck Norris has 7,583.
170. A random person once told Chuck Norris the a round-house kick isn�t a real marital arts move. What ensued, historians describe as one of the worst mistakes in history.
171. Chuck Norris did, in fact die once. But when he got to Heaven, he arm wrestled God, beat his ass and God agreed to remake the world as it was.
172. What most people don�t know is that the S on Superman�s shirt doesn�t stand for �Superman� but actually stands for �Second Strongest Person� after Chuck Norris.
173. Chuck Norris discovered fire, invented the wheel, and created the tide stain stick.
174. When a kid says to you �Santa�s not real, how could he travel to all those houses in one night.� You reply �Chuck Norris could.�
175. The What Would Jesus Do bracelets were once turned into What Would Chuck Norris Do bracelets but had to be turned back because to many people were being round house kicked in the face
176. When you say Bloody Mary in front of a mirror 3 times she cuts your eyes out� When you say Chuck Norris in front of a mirror 3 times� well no one knows because there are no survivors
178. Tornados have nothing to do with weather�they are merely the breeze from a Chuck Norris round-house kick.
179. Chuck Norris found some English bastards telling jokes about him. He proceeded to wait three years, storing all his roundhouse kinetic energy. The blast from the kick disrupted the balance of nature, slowly killing half of Europe. We today know it as the Black Plague
180. When Chuck Norris runs, he�s really running in place� and happens to spin the world as he�s doing it
181. The reason Texas won the rose bowl is because Chuck Norris is from Texas�enough said�
182. Chuck Norris�s penis has its own gravitational pull and his balls orbit.
188. God asked if he could make the world in 10 days but chuck gave him 6. .
189. Chuck Norris is hotter than hell, now hell is called chuck Norris
192. It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
193. Chuck Norris is 1/8 Cherokee, not because of heritage, but because he ate a fucking Indian...
194. Chuck Norris is my anti-drug.
195. And Chuck Norris said � Let there be God!
196. Mr. T is not black but permanently bruised after questioning the power of Chuck Norris.
197. If you�re standing in line with $5, and Chuck Norris is standing right behind you with $5 Chuck Norris has more money than you.
198. Chuck Norris is the only one ever to get a 100 on the A.C.T.
199. Walker Texas Ranger didn�t get canceled; Chuck Norris decided it was too great for the eyes of mortals.
200. Chuck Norris is the reason the Trix rabbit can�t eat cereal..
201. Chuck Norris was refused a ticket to get on the Titanic�while reports say it sank because of an ice burg we all know what really happened. .
203. Chuck Norris never wets the bed; the bed wets itself in fear of chuck Norris
204. Ronald Reagan actually words were ��� Chuck Norris tear down this wall.
205. When Chuck Norris was born; he cut his own umbilical cord.
206. The last thing Helen Keller saw or heard was a roundhouse kick form Chuck Norris.
.207. Guns don�t kill people, Chuck Norris does
208. Chuck Norris doesn�t get hung-over; the alcoholic beverages which he consumed feel like shit the next morning
209. Chuck Norris can�t read, but he can kick like a fucking mule
210. Chuck Norris is so hard, that he hibernates, just so he can give the bears in the caves titty twisters
211. Rednecks lack teeth in many cases, because Chuck Norris round housed the shit out of their faces
212. My Bologna has a first name, and it�s Chuck Mother Fucking Norris
213. Chuck Norris doesn�t ejaculate sperm he ejaculates the world�s strongest men.
215. Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer�s nose is red because Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him in the face
218. Chuck Norris can make Rocks Bleed
219. Chuck Norris eats Buffalo wings from actual Buffalo.
220. Chuck Norris can eat air!
quote:Dat zijn er veel.Op donderdag 23 maart 2006 15:47 schreef Gi1337 het volgende:
Nog wat Norris Facts zitten echt leuke bij :
DOE EENS NIET
[ Bericht 97% gewijzigd door Bupatih op 23-03-2006 16:06:54 ]
oud maar hij blijft goed!
Maar het zal wel iets met kliekjes te maken hebben ofzo
Bupatih heeft zijn mening blijkbaar bijgesteld.
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